In a shocking display of continental coherency, Hungarian prosecutors have seen fit to drop charges against the organisers of Budapest Pride, a decision that has caused the British government to issue a statement so dripping with condescension it could polish a brass doorknob. The Foreign Office, in a rare moment of actually saying something, reaffirmed its 'support for free assembly,' a phrase they appear to have memorised from a fortune cookie labelled 'Human Rights.' The charges, which alleged that the Pride parade had somehow violated public health regulations by existing, were dismissed with the sort of bureaucratic shrug that makes you wonder if the Hungarian legal system runs on a mixture of paprika and apathy.
The UK's endorsement, while welcome, feels rather like a man applauding a fire engine for putting out a fire he didn't start, while his own house burns merrily in the background. After all, this is a nation where the police have perfected the art of 'kettling' protesters into bewildered human corrals, and where the right to assembly is often subject to the whims of whoever is holding the keys to the local park. Still, one must take victory where one can find it, even if it's a lukewarm pat on the back from a country whose own record on free assembly is about as pristine as a pub carpet after a football match.
The organisers of Budapest Pride, no doubt exhausted by the expensive charade of legal threats, can now focus on the important business of planning next year's parade, which will surely involve rainbows, glitter, and possibly a float shaped like a giant middle finger aimed at the Hungarian legislature. The UK government, having fulfilled its quarterly quota of supporting liberal values, will now return to its primary occupation: pretending that the House of Lords is a functional part of democracy rather than a retirement home for minor royals and former donors. So raise a glass of lukewarm gin to Budapest, where justice has been served with a side of lukewarm indifference, and to Britain, where we continue to champion the rights of others to assemble, provided they don't block the cycle lanes.
