In a move that has sent shivers down the spines of advertising executives and left the gin-soaked corners of this reporter's soul momentarily refreshed, Dettol has apologised for a Chinese advertisement that referred to 'toxic men'. The ad, which was part of a campaign in the People's Republic, suggested that certain male behaviours were, in fact, toxic. This, apparently, was too much for the British disinfectant giant. They have since issued a grovelling apology, affirming their commitment to 'positive masculinity' and 'inclusive advertising'.
Now, let us pause for a moment to appreciate the sheer, spectacular absurdity of this. Dettol, a company whose entire raison d'être is the elimination of germs, bacteria, and assorted microscopic nasties, has taken umbrage at the idea of applying the language of hygiene to human behaviour. Perhaps they fear a slippery slope. Today, 'toxic men'. Tomorrow, 'germ-ridden politicians'. The next day, 'viral misinformation'. Before you know it, they'd have to clean up the entire planet. And where's the profit in that?
But wait, there's more. British firms, we are told, uphold global advertising standards. This is a phrase that should be embalmed in formaldehyde and placed in a museum of self-congratulatory nonsense. British advertising standards, for those unfamiliar, are the same standards that brought us the 'Go Compare' opera singer, the 'Compare the Market' meerkats, and a relentless barrage of gambling ads that somehow manage to be both depressing and irritating. Yes, these are the paragons of global virtue. Dettol has apologised, not because they believe they were wrong, but because they were caught. This is the corporate version of a toddler saying sorry after being told they won't get any pudding.
And let us not forget the Chinese context. In a nation where the government regularly scrubs the internet of anything resembling dissent, where the concept of 'toxic masculinity' is about as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit, Dettol's ad was a brave, if clumsy, attempt to wade into the murky waters of gender politics. But brave is not a word that sits well with corporations. Bravery is for poets, soldiers, and people who drink gin at breakfast. Corporations prefer the safe, the bland, the universally acceptable. Hence the apology.
The real story here is not about Dettol or China or advertising standards. The real story is about the utter vacuity of modern corporate ethics. Dettol will continue to sell bottles of antibacterial fluid. 'Toxic men' will continue to exist. And British firms will continue to uphold global advertising standards, which is to say, they will continue to do whatever makes the most money while offending the fewest people.
I need another gin. This world is not clean. It never was.
