Westminster may be obsessed with Boris's latest gaffe, but spare a thought for the real drama unfolding in the Middle East. Iran's football federation has managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of qualification. A perfect storm of diplomatic incompetence and administrative chaos.
Sources within the Iranian camp confirm the squad is in disarray. A last-minute row over visas has left key players grounded in Tehran. The government, it seems, decided to play hardball with the host nation. A classic own goal. The result? The team is now scattered across two cities. Half in Doha. Half in a hastily arranged training camp in the desert. No preparation. No cohesion.
This is a regime that prides itself on appearances. Yet here they are, humiliated on the world stage before a ball is even kicked. The whispers are that the football federation chairman has been frozen out. The hardliners are calling the shots. And they don't care about the beautiful game. They care about politics.
The players are furious. I'm told senior squad members confronted officials in a heated meeting. Demanded answers. Got none. One source described the atmosphere as "toxic". The coach, a respected figure, is reportedly considering his position. If he walks, the campaign is dead.
And the fans? They know what's happening. Social media is ablaze with anger. #IranShame is trending in Farsi. The regime has a PR disaster on its hands. But will they back down? Don't bet on it.
This is classic Iranian brinkmanship. They've done it before. Remember the nuclear talks? Same playbook. But in football, you can't bluff your way to victory. You need preparation. Timing. Unity.
A former national team captain told me: "This is the worst preparation I've ever seen. We are a laughing stock. The players are demoralised. The federation is in chaos. And the government doesn't care."
There is still time. But only just. The first match is days away. If visas aren't sorted by tomorrow, key players will miss the opener. That would be catastrophic.
In the labyrinth of Iranian politics, football is often a pawn. But this time, the pawn may be sacrificed. The World Cup dream is on life support. And the doctors are arguing about who should pull the plug.
Watch this space. The next 48 hours will decide if Iran plays or goes home in disgrace.
