The Prime

In a turn of events so tragically farcical it could only be written by a committee of drunken celestial satirists, Israel has been unceremoniously plonked onto the UN's naughty list for sexual violence in conflict zones. Yes, the same Israel that has spent decades protesting its moral high ground has now been gifted a seat at the grimmest table in the diplomatic cafeteria. The blacklist, a hall of shame reserved for the world's most enthusiastic commissaries of conflict-related sexual atrocities, now features the Jewish state alongside such jolly company as ISIS and various warlords whose names I can't pronounce without spitting.