In a shocking display of parliamentary spine, Hungary’s MPs have collectively decided that Viktor Orbán’s grubby mitts have been slobbering over the levers of power long enough. A new reform slashes presidential terms to a mere eight years, a move that has sent EU democracy watchdogs into paroxysms of joy like labradors who’ve just been shown a biscuit. The UK, in a rare moment of not being wholly preoccupied with the price of Greggs pasties, has thrown its weight behind the reform, no doubt hoping to distract from the fact that their own executive calendar resembles a game of musical chairs composed entirely of dead-eyed zombies.
One has to hand it to Hungary’s MPs: they finally mustered the gumption to tell Orbán that his reign of slightly creepy nationalism has a sell-by date. The new amendment, ratified by a two-thirds majority, reduces the presidency from a previously vague ‘until I get bored or dead’ arrangement to a neat eight years. It’s like putting a timer on a tantrum, a temporal cage for a toddler tyrant.
EU democracy watchdogs, of course, are dancing in the streets. They’ve been sweating bullets about the state of democracy in Hungary for years, watching as Orbán slowly dismantled liberal institutions, turning the country into a sort of Central Florida with better paprika. But now, they say, Hungary is back on track, even if that track is still heavily cobbled with illiberal billboards and stuffed with anti-Soros conspiracy theories.
The UK’s role in this is particularly amusing. Let’s be honest, the British government has about as much moral authority to lecture on democracy as a fox giving a seminar on henhouse security. But they clumsily backed the reform, their diplomatic fingers crossed behind their backs while hoping no one mentions the House of Lords, the electoral system, or that one time they invaded Iraq on a pretext so flimsy it could be used as tracing paper. Still, credit where credit is due: the British ambassador’s champagne budget must have seen a mild uptick.
Orbán, for his part, reacted with the grace of an enraged toddler denied sugar. He called the reform a ‘stab in the back,’ a move that suggests he’s been reading the same script as authoritarian leaders everywhere. The reform’s supporters responded by pointing out that the only stab was to his cushy, constitution-free power party.
Now, let’s not pretend this fixes everything. Hungary’s media landscape is still a barren wasteland of pro-government propaganda, the judiciary is about as independent as a spin instructor with a bad back, and minority rights have been systematically dismantled with surgical precision. But hey, baby steps. At least now there’s a deadline, a calendar date when Orbán will have to pack his bags, take his golden parachute, and go count his money in some tax-haven villa.
This is democracy, ladies and gentlemen. A slow, agonising process where victory is measured in incremental gains, where the good guys occasionally win, and where a prime minister can be limted to eight years just by the ballot box. It’s not perfect, but it beats the alternative: a world where strongmen rule forever and the only change comes in the label of the toilet paper they use to wipe their bottom.
So raise a glass (or a shot of cheap gin) to the Hungarian MPs. They’ve done something astonishingly decent. Let’s just hope they don’t get cold feet and step back into the warm bath of authoritarianism. In the meantime, Orbán’s time is ticking, and for once, it’s not counting down to another election rigged in his favour.
