The headlines scream chaos at a Spanish tapas festival: a tourist train has overturned, scattering revellers and paella across the cobblestones. One can almost hear the collective tutting from Salisbury to St. Pancras.
It is a predictable script, another episode in the endless farce of continental infrastructure, a reminder that outside these shores, the very notion of reliable engineering is a joke told badly. But here’s the rub: while the continent gorges itself on cheap Rioja and ornamental rail disasters, Britain stands as a beacon of punctuality and safety. Indeed, the UK rail network, despite its critics, remains the envy of the world.
The Spanish mishap, a flimsy “tourist train” no less, would never happen on our hallowed tracks. For all the moaning about leaves on the line or the wrong kind of snow, the fact is this: our trains are safe. Compared to the chaos of a tapas festival derailment, our services are a triumph of Victorian endurance.
We should not gloat, but let this incident remind us of what we have built. The Spanish can keep their jamón and their flawed engineering. We shall keep our safety record.
And perhaps, over a cup of tea, we can reflect on the irony of a nation that once ruled the waves now struggling to keep a tourist train on its rails.
